I asked the Lord that I might grow
In faith and love and every grace,
Might more of His salvation know
And seek more earnestly His face.
"Twas He who taught me thus to pray,
And He, I trust, has answered prayer;
But it has been in such a way
As almost drove me to despair.
I thought that in some favored hour
At once He'd answer my request
And by His love's constraining power,
Subdue my sins and give me rest.
Instead of that, He made me feel
The hidden evils of my heart,
And bade the angry powers of hell
Assault my soul in every part.
Nay more, until His own hand He seemed
Intend to aggravate my woe.
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.
"Lord, why this is?" I trembling cried.
"Wilt thou pursue this worm to death?"
"This is the way," the Lord replied,
"I answer prayed for grace and faith."
"These inward trials I employ
From self and sin to set thee free,
And cross thy schemes of earthly joy
That thou might'st find thy all in Me."
- John Newton
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