Resilience again

Were talking to K last night about my previous post - denial and resilience.

He mentioned about denial should not be associated with resilience, because resilience comes with acceptance. Only with acceptance can you cope better with the next fall. Denial doesn't help you cope better. You'll just repeat history.

Kinda make me recall what my PM lecturer mentioned. It's not about thinking positive, but thinking realistically. I asked him, what if you really feel very very sad about losing a competition, and no matter how you try to think positive, you can't. Then he mentioned about the misconception. It's natural to feel sad. Give yourself 1 day, or even 1 week to mop over it. Sob and cry. You're only human. But there has to be a limit. It's to think realistically. Realistically, it's not the end of the world. There is always another competition. And realistically, you did learn something from the competition, an experience.

Thinking realistically is accepting that the bad thing has happened. And maybe it's really bad. But there are always alternatives. Life never close a door on you, without opening another door. Maybe it's not as good as your first choice, but if it still get you to, or at least close to, what you want, why give it up for a past that cannot be changed?